If you don’t want your marriage dead even before you celebrate your first anniversary then make a conscious effort to avoid situations that could lead to adultery, which is one of the top causes of doomed relationships, whether married or not.

Reverse the situation.

Try to imagine how you would feel if you discovered your partner has cheated behind your back. Hurt and betrayed wouldn’t cover it. You’d feel absolutely destroyed and shattered, won’t you? You’d feel terribly lacking, like you are undeserving of someone’s love and attention. You’ve lost confidence in yourself and hope for the future. You feel totally ruined. All these are what you’d causing your partner – the person you’ve sworn to love and cherish for better or for worse – to feel when you commit adultery.

Determine the reason you’re attracted to the other person.

Make an effort to objectively assess the feelings you have for the other person. Why do you find that person irresistible? What does that person have that your spouse doesn’t? What makes that person so attractive you’re willing to risk your marriage, your career even, and your entire life for an adulterous affair?

Once you’ve pinpointed the source of your attraction, consider this: is this something you can never expect to get from your partner? If there’s the smallest chance that you could enjoy the same thing with your partner then you should seriously reconsider having an affair. Why not try to work things out with your partner first and see if you can get what you want? Who knows? You might be surprised to find out that your partner wishes to give you the very same thing you want but has no idea how to do so.

Think of the other person’s bad side.

Every person has a bad side, a combination of serious attitude problems and pet peeves. With your spouse, for instance, you hate the fact that he smokes too much and that he’s never on time for anything. But you’ve learned to accept these things because you know there could be worse habits you’re partner could have like an incurable drug addiction.

Now, consider the bad side of the other person you’re interested in having an affair with. He or she is sure to have a bad side as well. Fish around for news and you’ll know what it is. Imagine living with a person with that kind of attitude. Is it something you can truly find acceptable in the long term?

Remind yourself what you love most about your partner.

Conversely, think of all the good things about your partner. Remind yourself of why you fell in love with your partner in the first place. What was it that made you think you’ve met the person you want to spend the rest of your life with?

Now, imagine living the rest of your life without your partner by your side. Perhaps you won’t notice the change in your life when your partner is gone for a few days and you’re enjoying eating as much as you can of forbidden fruits. But try taking a vacation on your own – please do not make the mistake of using this as an excuse to start your affair – for a month. That’s probably long enough for you to appreciate how much your life has changed for the better ever since you married your partner.

Don’t drink without the presence your spouse or someone who can stop you from doing something you’d regret.

It’s a fact that alcohol has a way of lowering a person’s inhibitions. It doesn’t mean you’re exceptionally weak or wicked. It’s simply the result of your body’s chemical reaction to liquor. As such, it’s best that you take your spouse with you whenever you believe there’s a chance you plan to drink. If you can’t take your spouse with you then take someone who’s willing to stop you from starting something you’d regret. If that’s impossible as well then you should seriously reconsider taking a rain check.

This may seem excessive but it’s better to be safe than sorry.

Two is only a good number for you and your spouse…or someone from the same gender.

Anything else is inexcusable. It doesn’t matter if it’s your long-lost childhood friend, your secretary, or the President of the United States. Unless they’re a hundred years older and there’s something seriously wrong with them you’d be crazy to find the other person attractive, it’s simply not a good idea to spend time alone with another person beside your spouse.

So many things can happen when you and another person have a date. And yes, that’s really what it is, whether the two of you merely have a platonic or business relationship. When people you know catch you on a date with someone else then your spouse could hear about it from others and misconstrue things. Going on a date with someone else can also lead to something more…something that has the power to ruin your marriage.

Don’t offer or accept a ride home that will leave you alone with another person of the opposite gender.

There’s a reason why so many works of fiction show adulterous affairs beginning with an innocent offer to give someone a ride home. So be smart and avoid one of the more common adultery traps. If it’s absolutely necessary to drive someone home then make sure that the last person you’ll drive is someone from the same sex or someone blood related.

Wear your wedding ring at all times.

Last but not the least, don’t forget to flaunt the essential symbol of your marriage and your commitment to your spouse: your wedding ring. Keep it on your finger at all times. It’s better to risk having it dirtied rather than being mistaken for single.

Of the many offenses you can commit against your partner, infidelity or adultery is arguably the most unforgivable. Even the strongest and longest marriages can crumble in the face of adultery. If you want to enjoy a long and happy relationship with your spouse, don’t fool around.